A nurse says to a new father, “Your baby is very pretty.”
The father looks pleased, “Really? Come on, don’t you say this to everybody?”
The nurse shakes her head, “No, of course not.
The father wonders, “So what do you say if the baby’s ugly?”
The nurse smiles, “Then I say the baby really takes after its father.
2nd joke: Two old ladies were discussing
Two old ladies were discussing their husbands over tea.
“I wish that my Robert would stop biting his nails.”
It gets me very upset.
“My Calvin used to do the same thing,” the older woman replied.
“But I broke him of the habit.”
“How?” the first women asked “I hid his teeth.”